For nearly two decades, I have been a resident doctor at the Mushroom Kingdom Hospital, in the Division of Virus Research. Patients depend on my Megavitamins to eradicate a seemingly never-ending stream of horrible viruses. Under a microscope, the viruses appear multicolored, with gloved hands and feet. Sometimes, they appear to have demonic faces. In my nightmares, they laugh at me.
Usually, I try to post things I assume we citizens of the Internet have not yet seen—fan art, for instance, or dopey YouTube videos from three years ago. But I do love McSweeney’s, both print and online, and especially when it acknowledges its secret and undying love for videogames.
Therefore, even though you have already read it, I cannot sideline BoingBoing for its most excellent discovery, that of Marco Kaye’s Dr. Mario Weighs in on Universal Health Care:
“Consider the hostile planet Zebes, which the female warrior Samus liberated many years ago.” Kaye is right! Despite Samus’ work, Zebes is totally teeming with viral wildlife. I could easily catch an X Parasite there! Well, I’m convinced; I’m moving to Mushroom Kingdom.